In the recent light of attacks on our Marines and those who defend their actions, I’d like to take a moment to reflect on the things I do that would be construed as ignoble, or opposite of politically correct.
1. I refer to black people as “black people.” Horrendous, I know, but to be honest I’d much rather call them black than something like “African-American” because that would be lying. About 99.9% of the black people I meet do not hail from Africa nor have ever even set foot onto that continent. In fact, the most African-American person I know is in fact, white. I wouldn’t wanna be called an “English-American” seeing as how that’s where my ancestors came from, though I was born in America. Also, who wants to rename “Black History Month” “African-American History Month?” Let’s keep the words to a minimum folks. Less is more.
2. I talk about God and Jesus in public. Why? Because I can, welcome to America, and nobody seems to have a problem with this except for atheists, which I find odd. I can have a pleasant conversation with a Muslim or a Buddhist about religion and never feel one iota of anger or indignity about my belief or theirs, but the moment I mention God around an atheist, I have to gear up for Word War III (I didn’t misspell it, I meant Word) because Mr. or Miss Atheist is gonna come out swinging. Honestly, for folks who don’t believe in God, they sure do obsess about Him.
3. I don’t really treat women as “equals.” WHOA HANG ON! Put your mace away and listen. I hate the fact that the women’s groups of today try to elevate women to some holy standard over men while preaching “equality.” They don’t want “equality”; they wanna subjugate men. Look at the media today- I can’t watch one commercial about a husband and wife without them portraying that husband as a blundering idiot and his wife is the clever head of the household who is charitably settling for him. Give me a break. I treat women like women. Meaning, I open doors for them, refer to elders as ma’am, do the heavy lifting, and pay for the meal when I’m on a date. It’s not that I think they’re weak, it’s just that I think it’s polite and I like hot girls paying attention to me.
4. I speak English. In fact, I dunno if you noticed this but a lot of us around these parts speak English. You could also say it’s the common tongue of America. So when someone tells me that I need to learn a second language because it’s rude that I don’t speak the tongue of another country, I tend to get a little irked. If you are coming into America should probably constitute a few changes in your lifestyle. For one, learning to speak the language is a must because it’s how we communicate, do business, or yell at each other on website forums and comment responses. I shouldn’t have to conform in my own country to a culture I’m a stranger to. If I go to France, Mexico, or Dragon Con, I expect them know French, Spanish, and Elvish respectively, not the other way around. America is a melting pot folks, and the label on the side of it is in English. Melt accordingly.
5. I pee on my enemies. Sure not physically, but mentally and metaphorically, and I do it all the time, especially when it comes to the Taliban or similar institutions. If a U.S. marine kills a murderer of innocent people and then needs to take a leak… by gum I think he’s earned the right to such a privilege. Also, what’s the deal with the media getting up in arms about it? I seem to remember R. Kelly urinating on a young girl and the media could have cared less, but a Marine relieves himself on a truly evil person who slaughters innocent children (yup his organization has done so) and suddenly the lefty MSM get’s up in arms? Whose side are they on? When Dana Loesch gets on her radio show and defends the marines by saying she’d “drop trou” and do it too, the Left starts trying to get her fired from CNN. Yet, if one of theirs goes out and calls Right-wing folks “terrorists” or that they should “die screaming of rectal cancer,” nobody says a peep. Apparently for anyone to get away with anything in this country they have to love terrorists, hate American morale, and just be an all around idiotic jackass.
Now if you’ll excuse me I have to take a whiz.